Usually, my topic for each Friday post comes to me pretty easily. Either God will put something on my heart or I'll come across a subject in an article, book or in a conversation with a friend. Then I'll pray about it, expand upon it and ta-da! A Physical Friday post is born.
But not this week. As of Wednesday, I still had nothing. And the only reason I'm able to write this post right now is because I took a long hard look at myself in the mirror and saw myself doing the very thing I'm going to urge you all not to do.
Ladies, we have so much power through our tongues (minds out of the gutter, please). When I say power, I'm not talking about manipulative, conniving, say-things-just-to-get-what-I-want power. I'm talking about the power to make or break our husbands with just our words. From what I've seen in my own life this week, women don't realize how much what we say contributes to our husband's success, happiness, motivation, or likewise his failure, dissatisfaction and lack of motivation.
Sometimes when I look at Big A, I see this man with a shield or armor, indestructible, strong, able to handle anything. So when I disrespect him or question his ability at every turn, I expect him to just take it like a man.
But instead of that, my words cut right through that rugged exterior and undermine the man that he is. He's defeated and worn down and shuts himself off from me emotionally and physically.
It turns out that he's not invincible. He gets his feelings hurt just as easily and as often as I do. And for him, it seems that the rejection he feels trickles down into everything he does. I'm seeing the effects of that after the last week or two of speaking out of anger and hurt instead of out of love.
But when I build him up with compliments and genuine expressions of love (a sweet note, an extra long hug, a lovey-dovey message (absolutely no texts), the sky is the limit for him. He will move a mountain for me if I ask him to. He will CLEAN THE TOILETS, put up the shelf in the living room that has been sitting by the fireplace for months (hint, hint), spend a Sunday afternoon with the kids so I can take a nap, cuddle with me so much that I get sick of cuddling. He will go to work each day to a job he doesn't really care for and do his best to support our family. He will work extra hours on his side job so I can stay home with our kids. He will be an amazing, involved father and an awesome spiritual leader.
He wants to be my hero so badly.
But it's all in my power to let him be.
And you may say "But my husband never builds me up! Why should I build him up?" Please, just try it and see what happens. If it doesn't work, you can unsubscribe and you never have to read my stupid advice again. Fighting fire with fire isn't always the best way to get through to a man. But fighting fire with, um, chocolate cake and sprinkles, seems to do the trick. In other words, kill him with kindness.
So how does this all apply to getting physical. If we can let our husbands know how much they please us sexually, they'll feel like Superman. A man whose wife makes him feel like a stud muffin doesn't care so much about problems at the office or their never-ending to-do list or the million other things that weigh on his shoulders. If she thinks he's a stallion, pleasing her is what matters to him.
This week, I'll be remembering these verses as I strive to build up my husband. I pray you'll join me.
Proverbs 12:18 "Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing."
Proverbs 18:21 "The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit."
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